Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Life twists
Tough times for friends. Puts my petty problems into sharp perspective. My dear, dear buddy Mark's marriage has fizzled. Another friend dropped dead Sunday. Barely into his fortieth decade on the planet.
I am heartbroken, and yet, a celebration is planned for buddy Mark's fiftieth birthday this weekend. It'll be here at my abode. Bittersweet. It'll be good for him to have his friends around him. But there will those who will be missed....
I am heartbroken, and yet, a celebration is planned for buddy Mark's fiftieth birthday this weekend. It'll be here at my abode. Bittersweet. It'll be good for him to have his friends around him. But there will those who will be missed....
Posted at 12:15 AM | |
Friday, January 25, 2008
Dear Man o My Dreams
I found the list below over at Men's Health. Don't ask me why I was reading Men's Health. I wasn't - just cruising on StumbleUpon. Whoever put it together purty much has it dead on.
Women can use most of the list for their man, too - I've made some suggestions in parentheses.
Women can use most of the list for their man, too - I've made some suggestions in parentheses.
- Ask her to dance. (Don't even...)
- On windy days, brush wayward strands of hair from her eyes and mouth. (Works for the guy, too)
- When she’s coming down the street, across the room, or up the stairs to meet you, walk towards her as soon as you see her. (Works for the guy, too)
- Kiss her between her shoulder blades when she turns her back to you to go to sleep. (Works for the guy, too)
- Put your arm around her when you introduce her to your friends and family. (Works for the guy, too)
- Grasp her hand when a scantily dressed, beautiful woman walks by. (Say "She's hot" when she walks by)
- Call her when you’re feeling sad. (Call him when he's feeling sad)
- Kiss her eyelids. (Works for the guy, too)
- Ask to see a picture of her when she was a child. (Don't even...)
- Wash her from head to toe in the shower. (Works for the guy, too)
- If she’s crying on the phone, go over to her place. Immediately. (If he's crying on the phone, assure him the team will rock it out next season)
- Stand her naked on a sturdy chair and lick between her legs. (Straddle a chair naked and say "c'mere, baby')
- Occasionally call her by her first and middle names. (Continually call him your Big Stud)
- Buy her your favourite rock album of all time on vinyl. (Buy him HIS favorite album on vinyl)
- Order coffee for her, remembering exactly how she likes it. (Order beer for him, remembering exactly which brand he likes)
- Undress her and put her to bed when she falls asleep in the car. (Help him to the couch - he passed out)
- Mention your upcoming anniversary before she does. (don't expect him to remember - love him anyway)
- Send her something in the mail. Anything. (Send him tickets to the big game in the mail)
- When she’s feeling insecure, stare into her eyes and tell her there is no-one in the world who could be as right for you as she is. (See #12)
- Call her just before you get on the plane. (Tune the TV to ESPN before you leave the house to go on a trip)
- Pick her clothes up off the floor. (Get the clothes to the floor by doing a strip tease)
- Try desperately to make her laugh when she’s feeling down. (See #12)
- Take her to see your favourite sport live. Pay more attention to her than to the game. (Know Brett Favre's stats like the back of your hand)
- Touch her arm when you leave the table to go to the bathroom. Touch her again when you come back. (Touch his thigh)
- Shave just before you see her. She’ll notice. (Works for the guy, too)
- Hug her when she gets jealous. Hug her hard. (See #12)
- Worship her breasts. (Worship his, well you know)
- Give her jewelery. (Give him tickets to the big game)
- Hand her two towels when she gets out of the shower. [The second one is for her hair.] (Be standing there in a towel when he gets out of the shower)
- Ask her specific questions about her work. (Works for the guy, too. Especially if you're doing a strip tease while you're asking)
- Keep her favorite cereal on hand. (Works for the guy, too. Keep a second box in the bedroom along with a jar of honey)
- In the middle of a conversation, tell her you love her. (In the middle of a conversation, squeeze his thigh)
- Send her very expensive flowers when you screw up. (See #28 above)
- Take her to a cabin with a fireplace. Build her a fire. (Make sure the cabin is by a lake and bring the fishing gear)
- Moan her name when she goes down on you. (See #13)
- Read her a story when it’s her turn to drive during a long road trip. (Just let him drive)
- Offer to fix something at her place that you realize is broken. (Learn how to use tools - especially a circular saw.)
- Notice when she’s wearing something new. (Help him notice by doing a strip tease)
- Make love to her standing up, against a wall. (Oh boy does it work for the guy, too)
- Kiss her hand in front of your most die-hard bachelor buddies. (Don't even...)
- If she’s too stressed to want sex... (He will never be too stressed to want sex)
- Run a bath for her.
- Give her a full-body massage.
- Ask if she wants to wrestle.
Posted at 1:01 PM | |
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Choice
I'm a day late - yesterday was the anniversary of Roe v Wade. Thirty five years ago the Supreme Court recognized a woman's right to choose whether or not to end a pregnancy. I was twenty-one years old.
I am profoundly pro-choice and understand it is never an easy one. At least not for anyone who has a conscience. The Supreme Court decision was a good one and this anniversary reminds me that we must continue to fight the good fight to prevent a return to an era of back alley butchers and bent hangers.
I read the words of another woman today who eloquently expresses the deeper meaning of that landmark decision thirty five years ago. Go, read.
I am profoundly pro-choice and understand it is never an easy one. At least not for anyone who has a conscience. The Supreme Court decision was a good one and this anniversary reminds me that we must continue to fight the good fight to prevent a return to an era of back alley butchers and bent hangers.
I read the words of another woman today who eloquently expresses the deeper meaning of that landmark decision thirty five years ago. Go, read.
Posted at 9:35 AM | |
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
I am woman...
Sometimes I do things that can make me pretty darn proud of myself. Living a single life, I've had to learn how to be self-reliant over the years - which means bug extermination, spider elimination and all such squeamish chores are completely up to me. A scream of "ewwww! help!" would only elicit bland looks from the other two occupants of my abode before curling back up for a furry nap in the chair.
Some household chores and tasks present tricky challenges from time to time. Furniture moving in particular. I've got a somewhat reliable system which involves scooching, tugging, pushing, and shoving, usually on my butt and with my legs. It may take me longer than what could normally be expected, but I get it done. Most times.
Over the past few months I've been gradually moving my office, such as it is, to the upstairs loft. It's a largish room that overlooks the front entrance and a part of the living room and kitchen area (I have one of those "open" floor plans). The most difficult task was a set of bookshelves for my stash of paper backs and other books that were collecting dust and becoming a mountain for the kitties to play on. It was time to shelve them properly.
The difficulty with getting furniture and such upstairs lies in a rather awkward spiral staircase. A type of staircase that my builder vowed he would never again ever install in a house ever again. Ever. I managed to get the bookshelves up the staircase, unassembled, one box at a time, literally dragging them up and then assembling them upon arrival. Who needs a gym?
Today I attacked the problem of getting the office chair up. I came upon the solution in a round about way. Of course it was the logical and easiest solution, however I'm notorious for going at things ass-backward. I've dulled many a blade in Occam's razor, believe me.
...out of that room...
I know most of you have already figured out how to do it in the simplest, most efficient manner. I ultimately figured it out, too. But first, I had to ponder it for a few weeks. Why? I was stuck on the notion that I would have to get a hoist to lift it up over the partial wall overlooking the living room.
While I was trying to figure out how to get it out of the room downstairs in a manner that would not require moving another piece of furniture out of the way in the little hall way, I had that annoying light bulb moment. Annoying because that's when I saw that I'd been trying to make this a lot harder (typical) than it needed to be.
A quick scan of the chair told me what I needed. I made a trip to Lowes, purchased the tools I would need and after the required stroll around the flooring, kitchen cabinetry and appliances (a girl never stops dreaming about appliances...) I returned home to attack the task.
Of course the solution was to dismantle the chair, haul each piece up the stairs and reassemble it. Duh.
So now I'm in my comfy office chair up in the loft thoroughly amazed at my awesomeness - clumsy awesomeness, but awesomeness none-the-less. And I've filed this solution away for future use:
Some household chores and tasks present tricky challenges from time to time. Furniture moving in particular. I've got a somewhat reliable system which involves scooching, tugging, pushing, and shoving, usually on my butt and with my legs. It may take me longer than what could normally be expected, but I get it done. Most times.
Over the past few months I've been gradually moving my office, such as it is, to the upstairs loft. It's a largish room that overlooks the front entrance and a part of the living room and kitchen area (I have one of those "open" floor plans). The most difficult task was a set of bookshelves for my stash of paper backs and other books that were collecting dust and becoming a mountain for the kitties to play on. It was time to shelve them properly.
The difficulty with getting furniture and such upstairs lies in a rather awkward spiral staircase. A type of staircase that my builder vowed he would never again ever install in a house ever again. Ever. I managed to get the bookshelves up the staircase, unassembled, one box at a time, literally dragging them up and then assembling them upon arrival. Who needs a gym?
Today I attacked the problem of getting the office chair up. I came upon the solution in a round about way. Of course it was the logical and easiest solution, however I'm notorious for going at things ass-backward. I've dulled many a blade in Occam's razor, believe me.
So I needed to get this chair... 
...out of that room......and up these stairs: 
I know most of you have already figured out how to do it in the simplest, most efficient manner. I ultimately figured it out, too. But first, I had to ponder it for a few weeks. Why? I was stuck on the notion that I would have to get a hoist to lift it up over the partial wall overlooking the living room.
While I was trying to figure out how to get it out of the room downstairs in a manner that would not require moving another piece of furniture out of the way in the little hall way, I had that annoying light bulb moment. Annoying because that's when I saw that I'd been trying to make this a lot harder (typical) than it needed to be.
A quick scan of the chair told me what I needed. I made a trip to Lowes, purchased the tools I would need and after the required stroll around the flooring, kitchen cabinetry and appliances (a girl never stops dreaming about appliances...) I returned home to attack the task.
Of course the solution was to dismantle the chair, haul each piece up the stairs and reassemble it. Duh.
So now I'm in my comfy office chair up in the loft thoroughly amazed at my awesomeness - clumsy awesomeness, but awesomeness none-the-less. And I've filed this solution away for future use:
When in doubt, take it apart, dumb-ass.
Labels: home, Life, living single
Posted at 10:27 PM | |
