Friday, March 14, 2008
"Sexism! Still a Force in American Politics"
I am always suspicious of forwarded emails. Most (memed surveys, "click this", and megabytes of cute jpegs) I usually discard without even reading. My sister is the source of many of the forwarded emails I receive. As this is usually the only communication I get from her, I am loath to discourage her of the habit. Every now and then, though, I get something from her that makes me laugh, intrigues me or makes me think.
One such forward landed in my in-box today. It echoed thoughts that have been racing through my head during this election season. After reading it, I went to the altar of Google and invoked its great wisdom regarding the author of the essay. I wanted to know if this person actually existed and whether or not he was a legitimate intellect or some crackpot. It's always helpful to know if one is running with the idiots or with genuine thinkers.
Google offered up the source of the essay - John Shelby Spong's website. From Bishop Spong's website, I learned that he is a very liberal retired Episcopalian Bishop who e-mails his essays to subscribers. For a fee. Yes, capitalism is alive and well even in liberal Christiandom.
I did, however, find the few essays that were available for free to be interesting and compelling. Plus, this guy has some street cred with appearances on several prominent television shows - 60 Minutes, Politically Incorrect and the ever enlightening Extra.
Ok, so maybe that last endorsement lands him in the crackpot pile, however I suspect, depending on one's religious, political or intellectual point of view, he is viewed as both crackpot and wise sage.
At any rate, I felt the essay my sister forwarded was worthy of passing on. This election year is proving to be historical, stirring up passions in the political arena that haven't been seen in ages - if ever. Bishop Spong offers a reasoned point of view that, admittedly, could be criticized as biased, but at the very least is food for thought - especially for those folks out there who are quick to paint Hillary Clinton as an evil entity bent on obtaining power at all costs. It might just explain why she's fighting so hard.
Anyway - here it is for you to read:
March 12, 2008
Sexism! Still a Force in American Politics
The quest for the Democratic nomination continues to ebb and flow as the two rivals struggle to gain an edge. Senator Clinton was presumed to be the front runner prior to the Iowa Caucuses, but Senator Obama won that state impressively. Then Senator Clinton came back to win the New Hampshire primary and looked poised for a sweep on Super Tuesday. The sweep turned out to be more of a draw and launched Senator Obama on to a string of eleven straight primary or caucus victories from South Carolina to Wisconsin from Washington to Vermont. Once more he seemed on the crest of victory. The super delegates who had been pledged to Senator Clinton began to waver and defect. No one smells blood better than a politician. The pundits were now sure that he would wrap up the nomination on March 4. It was, however, not to be as Senator Clinton roared back dramatically, scoring impressive victories in Ohio, Texas and Rhode Island. Next Senator Obama won a caucus in Wyoming and a primary in Mississippi to regain his frontrunner position, but he did not win so decisively that he was able to clinch the nomination. So the struggle now moves on to the key state of Pennsylvania in which Senator Clinton, according to the polls, stands poised to make her third comeback of this primary season.
Beneath the excitement of what is surely the most interesting political contest in recent memory, there is another dynamic, always present, but seldom talked about. Two debilitating prejudices, sexism and racism, are in this political process being routed from their dwelling places deep in the psyches of our citizenry. Both have had long histories in the Western Christian world. Racism, the more overt and obvious of the two prejudices, was once protected by the laws of this nation, but it has had its back broken first by the bloodiest war in our nation's history and second by a rising consciousness that found expression in the relentless pressure of the Supreme Court. Sexism on the other hand penetrated the culture in an almost assumed way that seemed to many to be appropriate, even proper. Even though sexism was also protected by the laws of this nation it was always more subtle and its evil less recognized. While no one would seriously argue today that racism in this society is dead, it is recognized at once when it rears its ugly head, while sexism is still widely supported in high places, including an obvious presence in the official statements of organized religion. Many church leaders continue to use a version of the "separate but equal" argument that has no credibility at all when applied in a racial context. No one in the political arena would dare to make an overtly racist comment, but overtly sexist comments have not been absent from this campaign. History tells us that while racism is crueler, sexism is more difficult to root out. Remember that this nation gave the vote to black men many years before it was given to white women. Data from this political season still points to the fact that sexism continues to be less recognized in the body politic than racism.
Senator Clinton, who had been first defined nationally as the "First Lady," had to establish her professional competence apart from her husband. She did this by winning a seat in the United States Senate, by mastering the intricacies of that most exclusive of clubs, by gaining the respect of her colleagues on both sides of the aisle, and by avoiding the spotlight of the media while doing her unglamorous homework. Her constituents in New York responded to these efforts and rewarded her with election to a second term by an astonishing 64% majority. Senator Obama, on the other hand, had been in the Senate for only two years when he announced his intention to seek the presidency. This is not to say that he is without significant credentials. He was an impressive student in law school, being chosen to be editor of the Harvard Law Review, an honor that goes only to Harvard Law School's top student. He taught constitutional law at the University of Chicago's Law School for ten years, during which time he was elected to and served in the State Senate of Illinois. Those accomplishments are not to be minimized, but it is to say that no woman with a resume as brief as that of Senator Obama would have been taken seriously as a presidential candidate. A woman still has to be twice as impressive to be viewed as equal. That is an expression of sexism.
Hillary Clinton also had to carry the baggage of her husband in a way that no male politician has ever had to do. She is colored by the foibles of her husband's administration. His negatives became her negatives. She wanted to keep her maiden name, Rodham, but political pressure on Bill Clinton after he lost the governor's office in Arkansas forced her to become Hillary Rodham Clinton. The loss of her own identity, a reality that women have had to live with for centuries, has played a significant role in this campaign when people, defining Hillary as a Clinton, realized that in the elections of 1980, 1984, 1988, 1992, 1996, 2000 and 2004 there had either been a Bush or a Clinton on the presidential ballot. She was thus identified with the Clinton politics of yesterday, not the Rodham politics of tomorrow. She was implicated in what came to be called the Whitewater Affair, which was investigated endlessly and finally dismissed, yet its odor seems to cling to her. When the Clintons left the White House in 2001 charges were made about the Clintons removing things that were not theirs. These charges turned out to be nothing more than political attacks and were demonstrated to be false; nonetheless the stain on her integrity remained. When Hillary Clinton was cast in the role of violated wife in the sordid Lewinsky affair, she could not win. She was criticized by some for refusing to leave her husband and by others for standing by her man. None of these things would have been the fate of a male politician. Sexism was clearly operating below the surface.
In 1972 when Shirley Chisholm became the first woman to seek the Democratic Party's nomination for the presidency, she carried with her candidacy the impact of both racism and sexism. It is interesting to note that she said overcoming her status as a woman was always more difficult than overcoming her status as an African-American. That was an indication that even long ago racism was more overt and easily identified in the public arena than was sexism. In support of that thesis, I cite the following data from this campaign.
When Bill Clinton played the race card in the South Carolina primary, it backfired because people, aware of racism, were embarrassed by it. The sexist rhetoric that commentators let forth on Hillary Clinton, however, did not receive a similar rebuke in the Court of Public Opinion. Carl Bernstein on live national television referred to Hillary's "thick ankles" and Tucker Carlson, an MSNBC conservative talking head, observed that "every time I get near Hillary Clinton I feel castrated." Those were weird sexist comments, saying more about both Bernstein and Carlson than they did about Senator Clinton, but the point is that no female reporter could have gotten away with describing Governor Huckabee's legs or with saying, "Every time I am in the presence of Mitt Romney, I feel like I am going to be raped!"
A male radio host for Station KOA in Denver, Colorado, wondered on a live national network whether Chelsea Clinton "was going to wind up with a big posterior like that of her mother." Can anyone imagine such a statement being made about a son of John Edwards? When a woman in a political gathering asked John McCain how he was going to "beat the bitch," he knew to whom the question applied and proceeded to answer it without unloading its hostility. McCain later, however, rebuked a right wing radio host when he spoke of Senator Obama in a derogatory racist manner.
Another radio talk show host accused a cable news channel of overreacting by suspending one of its political reporters, who had wondered aloud on national television "if the Clintons were pimping out their daughter as a campaign presence." Is that not sexism?
Senator Clinton also had the distinction of being the only candidate to be called "the anti-Christ" by a member of the religious right. That was, I believe, a sign of misplaced sexist rage. Why would not the three times married, admitted adulterer, Mayor of New York, whose children will not speak to him because of his treatment of their mother, be a candidate for that title? Yet he was spared this ultimate religious slander.
Many people quite clearly still carry unconscious fears about a powerful woman. Look at the way Sandra Day O'Connor was negatively described by all of the Republican candidates except John McCain. Look at the number done on Geraldine Ferraro when she was the vice presidential nominee. Look at how Margaret Thatcher developed the aura of autocratic masculinity to win in Great Britain and how British male pride was displayed when they described her "as a man wearing a skirt." Maybe no one ever forgets those years in our lives when we were helpless dependent infants being cared for by that seemingly all powerful woman we called mother. Maybe the fear of being made dependent again on a strong woman is still buried in our psyche. Maybe our sexist, male-oriented society, which still holds to the primary definition of a woman as a sex object, creates an unconscious difficulty in our ability to relate to women in a position of ultimate authority. Maybe women, who were taught how important it is to please a man to get ahead, were also threatened by her potential power. Perhaps that is why there have always been more "Aunt Jemimas" in the women's movement than there were "Uncle Toms" in the black movement. There is much about which we can speculate, but the fact of which we are certain is that sexist barriers are still potent and that Hillary Clinton, is the current victim.
People uncomfortable about this charge reply, "I am not opposed to women, only to this woman." However, this woman was the only one who has battled to the place where she has a real shot at the presidency and, in the final analysis, she has not yet won a normal portion of the white male vote while she has consistently lost,, never the majority, but a substantial part of the female vote to her opponent. Hillary Clinton may or may not become our next president. That is yet to be decided. What is clear, however, is that she has taken some of the sexist poison out of the body politic by absorbing it. That will make it possible if she fails in this quest for another woman in another day to climb to the top of the hill.
I am drawn to Hillary Clinton's ability and to her intelligence. I admire the integrity and independence of John McCain. I am excited about the vision of a potential Obama presidency. I hope, however, that I will live long enough to see my nation and this world be able to celebrate the full humanity and the equal competence of women.
John Shelby Spong
One such forward landed in my in-box today. It echoed thoughts that have been racing through my head during this election season. After reading it, I went to the altar of Google and invoked its great wisdom regarding the author of the essay. I wanted to know if this person actually existed and whether or not he was a legitimate intellect or some crackpot. It's always helpful to know if one is running with the idiots or with genuine thinkers.
Google offered up the source of the essay - John Shelby Spong's website. From Bishop Spong's website, I learned that he is a very liberal retired Episcopalian Bishop who e-mails his essays to subscribers. For a fee. Yes, capitalism is alive and well even in liberal Christiandom.
I did, however, find the few essays that were available for free to be interesting and compelling. Plus, this guy has some street cred with appearances on several prominent television shows - 60 Minutes, Politically Incorrect and the ever enlightening Extra.
Ok, so maybe that last endorsement lands him in the crackpot pile, however I suspect, depending on one's religious, political or intellectual point of view, he is viewed as both crackpot and wise sage.
At any rate, I felt the essay my sister forwarded was worthy of passing on. This election year is proving to be historical, stirring up passions in the political arena that haven't been seen in ages - if ever. Bishop Spong offers a reasoned point of view that, admittedly, could be criticized as biased, but at the very least is food for thought - especially for those folks out there who are quick to paint Hillary Clinton as an evil entity bent on obtaining power at all costs. It might just explain why she's fighting so hard.
Anyway - here it is for you to read:
March 12, 2008
Sexism! Still a Force in American Politics
The quest for the Democratic nomination continues to ebb and flow as the two rivals struggle to gain an edge. Senator Clinton was presumed to be the front runner prior to the Iowa Caucuses, but Senator Obama won that state impressively. Then Senator Clinton came back to win the New Hampshire primary and looked poised for a sweep on Super Tuesday. The sweep turned out to be more of a draw and launched Senator Obama on to a string of eleven straight primary or caucus victories from South Carolina to Wisconsin from Washington to Vermont. Once more he seemed on the crest of victory. The super delegates who had been pledged to Senator Clinton began to waver and defect. No one smells blood better than a politician. The pundits were now sure that he would wrap up the nomination on March 4. It was, however, not to be as Senator Clinton roared back dramatically, scoring impressive victories in Ohio, Texas and Rhode Island. Next Senator Obama won a caucus in Wyoming and a primary in Mississippi to regain his frontrunner position, but he did not win so decisively that he was able to clinch the nomination. So the struggle now moves on to the key state of Pennsylvania in which Senator Clinton, according to the polls, stands poised to make her third comeback of this primary season.
Beneath the excitement of what is surely the most interesting political contest in recent memory, there is another dynamic, always present, but seldom talked about. Two debilitating prejudices, sexism and racism, are in this political process being routed from their dwelling places deep in the psyches of our citizenry. Both have had long histories in the Western Christian world. Racism, the more overt and obvious of the two prejudices, was once protected by the laws of this nation, but it has had its back broken first by the bloodiest war in our nation's history and second by a rising consciousness that found expression in the relentless pressure of the Supreme Court. Sexism on the other hand penetrated the culture in an almost assumed way that seemed to many to be appropriate, even proper. Even though sexism was also protected by the laws of this nation it was always more subtle and its evil less recognized. While no one would seriously argue today that racism in this society is dead, it is recognized at once when it rears its ugly head, while sexism is still widely supported in high places, including an obvious presence in the official statements of organized religion. Many church leaders continue to use a version of the "separate but equal" argument that has no credibility at all when applied in a racial context. No one in the political arena would dare to make an overtly racist comment, but overtly sexist comments have not been absent from this campaign. History tells us that while racism is crueler, sexism is more difficult to root out. Remember that this nation gave the vote to black men many years before it was given to white women. Data from this political season still points to the fact that sexism continues to be less recognized in the body politic than racism.
Senator Clinton, who had been first defined nationally as the "First Lady," had to establish her professional competence apart from her husband. She did this by winning a seat in the United States Senate, by mastering the intricacies of that most exclusive of clubs, by gaining the respect of her colleagues on both sides of the aisle, and by avoiding the spotlight of the media while doing her unglamorous homework. Her constituents in New York responded to these efforts and rewarded her with election to a second term by an astonishing 64% majority. Senator Obama, on the other hand, had been in the Senate for only two years when he announced his intention to seek the presidency. This is not to say that he is without significant credentials. He was an impressive student in law school, being chosen to be editor of the Harvard Law Review, an honor that goes only to Harvard Law School's top student. He taught constitutional law at the University of Chicago's Law School for ten years, during which time he was elected to and served in the State Senate of Illinois. Those accomplishments are not to be minimized, but it is to say that no woman with a resume as brief as that of Senator Obama would have been taken seriously as a presidential candidate. A woman still has to be twice as impressive to be viewed as equal. That is an expression of sexism.
Hillary Clinton also had to carry the baggage of her husband in a way that no male politician has ever had to do. She is colored by the foibles of her husband's administration. His negatives became her negatives. She wanted to keep her maiden name, Rodham, but political pressure on Bill Clinton after he lost the governor's office in Arkansas forced her to become Hillary Rodham Clinton. The loss of her own identity, a reality that women have had to live with for centuries, has played a significant role in this campaign when people, defining Hillary as a Clinton, realized that in the elections of 1980, 1984, 1988, 1992, 1996, 2000 and 2004 there had either been a Bush or a Clinton on the presidential ballot. She was thus identified with the Clinton politics of yesterday, not the Rodham politics of tomorrow. She was implicated in what came to be called the Whitewater Affair, which was investigated endlessly and finally dismissed, yet its odor seems to cling to her. When the Clintons left the White House in 2001 charges were made about the Clintons removing things that were not theirs. These charges turned out to be nothing more than political attacks and were demonstrated to be false; nonetheless the stain on her integrity remained. When Hillary Clinton was cast in the role of violated wife in the sordid Lewinsky affair, she could not win. She was criticized by some for refusing to leave her husband and by others for standing by her man. None of these things would have been the fate of a male politician. Sexism was clearly operating below the surface.
In 1972 when Shirley Chisholm became the first woman to seek the Democratic Party's nomination for the presidency, she carried with her candidacy the impact of both racism and sexism. It is interesting to note that she said overcoming her status as a woman was always more difficult than overcoming her status as an African-American. That was an indication that even long ago racism was more overt and easily identified in the public arena than was sexism. In support of that thesis, I cite the following data from this campaign.
When Bill Clinton played the race card in the South Carolina primary, it backfired because people, aware of racism, were embarrassed by it. The sexist rhetoric that commentators let forth on Hillary Clinton, however, did not receive a similar rebuke in the Court of Public Opinion. Carl Bernstein on live national television referred to Hillary's "thick ankles" and Tucker Carlson, an MSNBC conservative talking head, observed that "every time I get near Hillary Clinton I feel castrated." Those were weird sexist comments, saying more about both Bernstein and Carlson than they did about Senator Clinton, but the point is that no female reporter could have gotten away with describing Governor Huckabee's legs or with saying, "Every time I am in the presence of Mitt Romney, I feel like I am going to be raped!"
A male radio host for Station KOA in Denver, Colorado, wondered on a live national network whether Chelsea Clinton "was going to wind up with a big posterior like that of her mother." Can anyone imagine such a statement being made about a son of John Edwards? When a woman in a political gathering asked John McCain how he was going to "beat the bitch," he knew to whom the question applied and proceeded to answer it without unloading its hostility. McCain later, however, rebuked a right wing radio host when he spoke of Senator Obama in a derogatory racist manner.
Another radio talk show host accused a cable news channel of overreacting by suspending one of its political reporters, who had wondered aloud on national television "if the Clintons were pimping out their daughter as a campaign presence." Is that not sexism?
Senator Clinton also had the distinction of being the only candidate to be called "the anti-Christ" by a member of the religious right. That was, I believe, a sign of misplaced sexist rage. Why would not the three times married, admitted adulterer, Mayor of New York, whose children will not speak to him because of his treatment of their mother, be a candidate for that title? Yet he was spared this ultimate religious slander.
Many people quite clearly still carry unconscious fears about a powerful woman. Look at the way Sandra Day O'Connor was negatively described by all of the Republican candidates except John McCain. Look at the number done on Geraldine Ferraro when she was the vice presidential nominee. Look at how Margaret Thatcher developed the aura of autocratic masculinity to win in Great Britain and how British male pride was displayed when they described her "as a man wearing a skirt." Maybe no one ever forgets those years in our lives when we were helpless dependent infants being cared for by that seemingly all powerful woman we called mother. Maybe the fear of being made dependent again on a strong woman is still buried in our psyche. Maybe our sexist, male-oriented society, which still holds to the primary definition of a woman as a sex object, creates an unconscious difficulty in our ability to relate to women in a position of ultimate authority. Maybe women, who were taught how important it is to please a man to get ahead, were also threatened by her potential power. Perhaps that is why there have always been more "Aunt Jemimas" in the women's movement than there were "Uncle Toms" in the black movement. There is much about which we can speculate, but the fact of which we are certain is that sexist barriers are still potent and that Hillary Clinton, is the current victim.
People uncomfortable about this charge reply, "I am not opposed to women, only to this woman." However, this woman was the only one who has battled to the place where she has a real shot at the presidency and, in the final analysis, she has not yet won a normal portion of the white male vote while she has consistently lost,, never the majority, but a substantial part of the female vote to her opponent. Hillary Clinton may or may not become our next president. That is yet to be decided. What is clear, however, is that she has taken some of the sexist poison out of the body politic by absorbing it. That will make it possible if she fails in this quest for another woman in another day to climb to the top of the hill.
I am drawn to Hillary Clinton's ability and to her intelligence. I admire the integrity and independence of John McCain. I am excited about the vision of a potential Obama presidency. I hope, however, that I will live long enough to see my nation and this world be able to celebrate the full humanity and the equal competence of women.
John Shelby Spong
Labels: Politics
Posted at 11:37 AM | |
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Reunion
I had something entirely different on the agenda to write about this evening, but it went by the wayside when I got a call this afternoon from an old friend. Barbara was a friend and neighbor from another time and another cul-de-sac years ago. That cul-de-sac was Faerie Queen Lane, a small spit of rental properties which cowered in the shadow of Owen Stadium, home of the OU Sooners.
I hadn't spoke to Barbara for, oh, probably a good thirteen, fourteen years. I almost didn't speak to her today. Thanks to an internet beta phone thingy, when Barbara called my home phone, it rang through to my cell and my office phone. I chose the option to put it through to the voice mail and listen in, since I didn't know who was calling. I hesitated before opting in to talk when I learned who was calling - why only became evident as the conversation ensued.
We were good friends back in the latter few years of my twelve year life on Faerie Queen Lane. She was a horse-woman and helped rid me of my fear of horses. She boarded her horse on a farm south by the river known then as Potts Farm. It was a milk farm and even up into the late '70s there were places you could still buy Potts dairy milk here in town.
Her horse, Wendy, was an Appaloosa and shared the acreage with a few other horses, one of which was a champion Ap - a stud named Shoshone. Barabara taught me to ride by getting me up on Shoshone, bareback, while she shadowed me on Wendy. One whole summer were down on the river-bottom three or four times a week. After I gained confidence bareback, she taught me how to saddle Shoshone, sit a western saddle and rein.
There's nothing I loved more then going for a ride. Eventually she got me to pick up speed and it didn't take long before I was perfectly comfortable at a gallop. There is nothing, I mean nothing, that compares to being on the back of a horse at full speed. Who needs drugs - that was an adrenaline high I couldn't get enough of.
Talking with her today brought back those memories. But my anxiety, and the reason for my phone hesitation, rose when it came to the "What have you been doing" portion of the conversation.
Barbara married and moved to Texas (I was one of a trio that sang at her wedding). I listened to her as she caught me up... daughter entering first year of college... still married to Chris.... taught school for thirteen years... volunteered with the police department and developed, wrote, and directed a video project.... (cue the hollow sound as the voice goes on and on).
I was impressed with all her accomplishments, but, well, it's this part of the "catching up" with people that has kept me far from reunions and such. It has the feel of "top this" about it. I could list my accomplishments and the things of which I'm proud, but the cruel fact is, I lose the competition without even getting out of the gate. No husband to boast of, no kids to brag on. Anything else coming out of my mouth is the cue for the auto response: "That's nice.... (blink, blink)."
Nonetheless, it was good to hear from her if for no other reason than I got to trek back to a time that was pretty darn good. I haven't ridden a horse since Barbara moved away. I seriously doubt I could last very long now - no "legs" to speak of. Doubt I could even hoist myself into the saddle let alone charge off at a full gallop. She was a good friend during an extraordinary part of my life - those years on Faerie Queen Lane. Some great memories were made there - and some not so great. Fodder for future posts, now that they've been stirred up....
...maybe one day I'll tell you about the time Barbara and I conned our way in to the fair and then conned our way into the rodeo - all for free. Or, no, wait, how about the time the south end of Faerie Queen Lane - including the baby - piled into Mary's van to take a tall-boy Coors and a straw - by request - to a DJ at a radio station in OKC... or the time a spontaneous party broke out a my duplex and we improvised and recorded a "Perils of Pauline" story while plowing through a case or two of beer... or the time - damn - so many great times.
I hadn't spoke to Barbara for, oh, probably a good thirteen, fourteen years. I almost didn't speak to her today. Thanks to an internet beta phone thingy, when Barbara called my home phone, it rang through to my cell and my office phone. I chose the option to put it through to the voice mail and listen in, since I didn't know who was calling. I hesitated before opting in to talk when I learned who was calling - why only became evident as the conversation ensued.
We were good friends back in the latter few years of my twelve year life on Faerie Queen Lane. She was a horse-woman and helped rid me of my fear of horses. She boarded her horse on a farm south by the river known then as Potts Farm. It was a milk farm and even up into the late '70s there were places you could still buy Potts dairy milk here in town.
Her horse, Wendy, was an Appaloosa and shared the acreage with a few other horses, one of which was a champion Ap - a stud named Shoshone. Barabara taught me to ride by getting me up on Shoshone, bareback, while she shadowed me on Wendy. One whole summer were down on the river-bottom three or four times a week. After I gained confidence bareback, she taught me how to saddle Shoshone, sit a western saddle and rein.
There's nothing I loved more then going for a ride. Eventually she got me to pick up speed and it didn't take long before I was perfectly comfortable at a gallop. There is nothing, I mean nothing, that compares to being on the back of a horse at full speed. Who needs drugs - that was an adrenaline high I couldn't get enough of.
Talking with her today brought back those memories. But my anxiety, and the reason for my phone hesitation, rose when it came to the "What have you been doing" portion of the conversation.
Barbara married and moved to Texas (I was one of a trio that sang at her wedding). I listened to her as she caught me up... daughter entering first year of college... still married to Chris.... taught school for thirteen years... volunteered with the police department and developed, wrote, and directed a video project.... (cue the hollow sound as the voice goes on and on).
I was impressed with all her accomplishments, but, well, it's this part of the "catching up" with people that has kept me far from reunions and such. It has the feel of "top this" about it. I could list my accomplishments and the things of which I'm proud, but the cruel fact is, I lose the competition without even getting out of the gate. No husband to boast of, no kids to brag on. Anything else coming out of my mouth is the cue for the auto response: "That's nice.... (blink, blink)."
Nonetheless, it was good to hear from her if for no other reason than I got to trek back to a time that was pretty darn good. I haven't ridden a horse since Barbara moved away. I seriously doubt I could last very long now - no "legs" to speak of. Doubt I could even hoist myself into the saddle let alone charge off at a full gallop. She was a good friend during an extraordinary part of my life - those years on Faerie Queen Lane. Some great memories were made there - and some not so great. Fodder for future posts, now that they've been stirred up....
...maybe one day I'll tell you about the time Barbara and I conned our way in to the fair and then conned our way into the rodeo - all for free. Or, no, wait, how about the time the south end of Faerie Queen Lane - including the baby - piled into Mary's van to take a tall-boy Coors and a straw - by request - to a DJ at a radio station in OKC... or the time a spontaneous party broke out a my duplex and we improvised and recorded a "Perils of Pauline" story while plowing through a case or two of beer... or the time - damn - so many great times.
Labels: Friends
Posted at 8:42 PM | |
Friday, March 7, 2008
Harlot's Dream*
Of the few folks who drift by this blog time to time, I know there's at least one person, maybe two, who understand why the above quote makes me positively cream...
The M3SC, like the former M36, features a 3-piece back, but with an added striking visual and tonal feature — the center wedge is Indian rosewood, with solid mahogany wings, and solid mahogany sides. The rosewood center wedge in the back adds warmth to an already crystalline mahogany tone. This spectacular mix is highlighted by C.F. Martin’s renowned hand-polished, nitro-cellulose gloss lacquer finish.
I returned to a familiar daydream today. One that brought back sounds, smells and sensations of a time long ago and which were intensified when I gave into temptation, fired up the browser and took a stroll.
Many, many years ago I fantasized about being the next rising star on the folk music horizon. My top heroes were the three "J-s" - Joan Baez, Judy Collins, and Joni Mitchell. During my high school years, most of my non-school hour time was spent with a guitar in my hands - I was either practicing or paying a bit of dues in front of an audience in the local coffee-houses.I never gained proficiency on the guitar - picking patterns continually eluded me and were a source of great frustration - but, I never let it stop me from playing. I would spend long hours learning a tune, chord by chord, verse by verse. The song was ready for performance when I finally reached the moment when it would become organic. I didn't need to think about the chords or the words or the tune - it would all just flow together and out.
There was a commercial that ran a few years ago that had a father and a young child sitting on a hill, under a tree, watching the sunset. The sun slowly dips below the horizon and then the young, awestruck child whispers "Do it again, Daddy." It's that kind of intangible magic moment that, when I'd hit it with a song piece, made me want to sing it over and over and over. It's that intoxicating high that made me want to share it with an audience. I loved it.
College days and new interests kept the Gibson in its case for longer and longer periods as time went on. I finally sold it a couple of years after college when it came down to a choice between it or the camera and dark room equipment when I moved from Oregon back to Oklahoma. I couldn't fit both in the car. Eventually, the songs left my memory, the callouses healed and my hands lost their familiarity with the strings and the frets.
Right now there's a ton of good modern folk/accoustic music floating the airwaves and residing on a million iPods. Listening to it provoked me into buying a ninety dollar guitar from the local pawn shop a couple of years ago. I wanted to learn and play that music. I wanted to revive a part of me that had been in a deep sleep for a very long time.
The guitar was at home in my hands. The smell of it evoked remembrances of smoky coffeehouses and sitting alone on a stool on a tiny stage. My hands struggled through the first few chord progressions. Determination kept me at it while I attempted to learn a tune I'd craved to learn since first hearing it. My voice isn't the voice of the singer I once was, but croaking out what I could while stumbling through the chords launched a time machine, of sorts, that took me back to that time when dreams were still possible and magic still happened. It felt good.
Unfortunately, I didn't keep at it. Other distractions took my attention away and the guitar has remained a mere decorative item on its stand in the living room. Today, however, I felt the desire rise again after listening to a couple of great songs. The number of female artists is exponentially greater than it was in those coffehouse days and the songs they are singing are songs I want to play.
And it's what, today, prompted me to type the magic words into Google which lead me the mecca of guitarists all over the world - the Martin & Co. website. I've had the desire to own a Martin guitar ever since the first callous formed on the fingers of my left hand. I came close - my Dad considered getting one for me as a birthday present one year, but stopped short when he saw the price tag of five-hundred dollars.
To buy the Martin I want, today would cost about three to four times that five hundred of thirty some-odd years ago. But, I'm really considering doing it. I hesitate, though, because I fear it would end up occupying space in a closet, rarely to be seen. That's a lot of money to spend for something to toss the laundry on to. However, I'm lured by the tone, the look, the feel and the craving for the high of accomplishment I once felt so long ago.
Select abalone pearl inlays in the Style 45 rosette, and around the top and fingerboard extension, are highlighted by black and white fine line wood fiber borders. The Madagascar rosewood headplate on the square, tapered headstock provides the canvas for the rare Alternative Torch inlay...
I need a cigarette.
*Mortal lovers must not try to remain at the first step; for lasting passion is the dream of a harlot and from it we wake in despair.
-C S Lewis
Posted at 9:25 PM | |
