So. Here I am on a beautiful Sunday sitting in one of my town's local Starbuck's and I'm kinda pissed. My original destination had been our town's local Panera because it has free wi-fi. I was hungry for a bacon-spinach egg soufflé and a cup of java. However, my timing was off - the church crowd had descended so there was not a parking space to be found.

Undaunted, and with a back-up plan, I headed to the west-side Starbuck's. No church crowd and Willie Nelson crooning "Blue Eyes Cryin'" on the Starbuck's radio, I ordered my tall latte and a wildflower honey almond bar. I'd settled into a comfy chair, whipped out the lap-top, and when I attempted to access the wi-fi - I was greeted with the home page of Starbucks - T-mobile - no free wi-fi....

WTF??

Oh, well. Just a wee setback in my inalienable right to the pursuit of happiness.

I have a birthday coming up at the end of this month. I step over the ridge and complete my 56th year of life. The cliche is inescapable - time is moving way too fast.

I attended a fund-raiser on Friday. I got embroiled in a conversation with an acquaintance that had me inwardly screaming "stop, stop now!" but, outwardly, I was helpless to change the conversation's course. We went from menopause to hysterectomies to hormone replacement therapy to osteoporosis to arthritis to our various chronic aches and pains. It was old people's talk and I wanted to run screaming into the night.

The next day a friend and I strolled around our town's campus shop area. It's Parents Weekend this weekend so there were many students and parents strolling around, too. In one kitchy shop, mother's and daughters were pawing through some of the latest fashions - all retro late 60's early 70's styles.

I over heard one mother talking about how she'd wished she'd hung on to the wardrobe of her college years "It's all back in style." I whined to my friend that the popular fashion today is what my 95 lb. 20 year old self would've been wearing, but would look ridiculous on this nearly 56 year old 145 lb frumpy frame.

Is she feeling sorry for herself? Oh, well, yeah. She is, a little. But I think really what's happening is that I'm more nostalgic, really, for the youth that I once was. I love that kid.

When I see folks my age who seem to have become resigned to their age and who have lost touch with that youth they once were, I get a little scared that I could become one of them. They've disengaged and seem older than their years would indicate.

I guess that's what happens when someone hits a "mid-life" crisis, huh? O lder men seek out younger women and older women pay a visit to the plastic surgeon... We're wanting to recapture that youth we once were.

I'm not about to visit a plastic surgeon, but I'd be lying if I said I haven't thought about it for a second or two (ok, "You Make Me Feel So Young" is now playing on the Starbucks radio... who ordered up this soundtrack for my day, huh?)....

While I'm currently navigating some twists and turns of life in the elder lane, at the end of the day I'm pretty happy with how I've turned out. I love that I have friends who span a wide range of ages and I'm certainly determined to not go gently into that good night, if you will forgive another cliche. . .

This birthday will pass just as the 55 that have come before it. The dings and dents of aging are what they are - a part of life to be dealt with, but the young girl who occasionally winks at me in my mirror will continue to encourage me and inspire me live young, keep learning and stay engaged.

I'm convinced that's the path to the fountain of youth, so let that be my birthday gift to you, dear reader. May you have as many as I have and many, many more...

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